Life's Too Short
by SG1Happy
Summary: Sometimes you have to make a choice.


An afternoon and evening of beer, pizza, and laughter had done them all good, Sam thought. For a few hours, SG1 had turned their collective backs on the inevitable to pretend they were normal people. 

Standing, Sam began to gather the debris of their meal, paper plates, two pizza boxes from the coffee table, three more in the kitchen. She was certain Teal'c had eaten two entire pizzas himself.

Jack rose and began to gather empty bottles and Teal's soft drink cans to the kitchen.

Daniel yawned and stretched as he stood. "Come on, Teal'c, I'll drop you off at the base."

"On the contrary, Daniel Jackson, "I will drive us back to the base. You have consumed too many alcoholic beverages to be a safe driver." Teal'c snatched the keys out of Daniel's hand as he stood.

Daniel peered owlishly through his glasses at the hulking Jaffa. "Good idea, Teal'c. I can pass out on the way and you can haul my butt inside."

"I shall not, Daniel Jackson. If you pass out in the car, you shall remain in the car."

Sam heard Jack's snort of laughter behind her as she smothered a smile of her own.

"Right" Daniel drew out the word as he considered his ability to remain conscious.

He had no head for alcohol. Just a couple of beers put him in la-la land. Tonight he had more than a couple. Tonight was a special occasion. A pre-death wake for a friend. Pushing the thought from his mind, Daniel turned to Sam.

"Hey Sam want us to drop you off at your house on our way to the base?"

"No thanks, I switched to water a little while ago. I have my car. I'm - I'm just going to help the Colonel clean up this mess." Smiling back at them, her hands full of pizza boxes and paper plates. These were the brothers of her heart. Life, death, battle, blood, boredom, and laughter. There was little she couldn't share with them - except what she was about to do.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Jack pause and shoot her a look.

Teal'c raised an eyebrow in question. The golden insignia on his forehead glinted in the lamp light. Keeping her eyes steady Sam met his gaze. Teal'c inclined his head in habitual gesture of respect and honor.

Tears caught in her throat. He knows. She inclined her head and closed her eyes, reflecting his gesture, a sad smile on her lips.

"What ?" Daniel, tipsy though he was, caught the undercurrent. His eyes sharpening on Sam. "What's wrong, Sam? Are you all right?"

Sam gave him the same sad smile. She was aware off Jack's eyes on her. His face inscrutable. Dumping the debris in her hands on the coffee table, she crossed to where Daniel and Teal'c stood. She did something she rarely allowed herself to do in public, show her feelings. Stepping up to Daniel she kissed him on both cheeks.

"Hey, what was that for?" Smiling sweetly, sloppily, he pushed up his glasses.

"For being one of my favorite people in the galaxy." Patting his cheek, she turned to Teal'c.

"You, too." She rose on her toes to kiss both his cheeks, grasping his broad shoulders for balance.

"Goodnight Major Carter." Deeply moved, Teal'c seized Daniel's arm and pulled him to the door.

"Night Sam, Night Jack." Daniel called over his shoulder. The door slammed behind them. 

Daniel complained, "Awwww, she didn't kiss Jack goodnight. Do you think she will kiss Jack goodnight?"

Teal'c resolutely pulled Daniel down the sidewalk, his own thoughts in turmoil.

"It is my belief Major Carter will indeed kiss Colonel O'Neill goodnight."

"What?" Daniel jerked out of Teal'c's grasp just as the reached the car, his eyes wide. A blaze of cold sobriety washed through his system.

"They can't." He glanced back the house and then to Teal'c. "Can they?"

Teal'c raised an eyebrow.

"I believe they will, regardless of whether the regulations say they can or cannot."

Teal'c pulled open his car door as Daniel gazed thoughtfully back at Jack's house. Considering.

Yanking open the door, Daniel plopped inside. His eyes met Teal'c's and silly grins slid across their faces.

"It's about time."

Sam placed the empty pizza boxes in the trash and regretted she had little else to do. Out of habit, she wiped down the counters and wondered where Jack had disappeared.

How did one go about seducing one's CO? She mused. Over the years there had been one or two other moments more natural, but they had never crossed that thick line the Air Force drew between them. In her mind, current circumstances changed all that. Jack had almost died a few weeks ago and unless they could figure out how to help him now, they were going to lose him for sure in a matter of days.

Rinsing her hands and drying them on a towel, she stood leaning against the sink, staring blankly into the porcelain depths. You got cold feet earlier today before Daniel and Teal'c showed up, she thought. Placing the towel on the counter, she made up her mind. 

She wasn't leaving here until she had said what she had come to say. If he was going to die, he would die knowing. 

Samantha's last stand.

Turning, she flinched violently. Jack stood in the harsh glare of the overhead kitchen light. His silver-shot hair glowing and his deep set eyes shadowed.

"I - I , uh, didn't know you were there." Her throat closed, her nimble brain shut down. What if she had waited too long? Her courage was a cold lump in her stomach.

"Something on your mind, Major?" Jack sliding his hands in his pockets, he shifted slightly, his dark eyes watching her, the way a cat watches a bird.

Major.

The barrier shouldn't be breached.

Sam closed her eyes, her heart sinking. Her courage fled like a deserter from a battlefield.

"I can't do this." Pushing away from the sink, aiming to walk past him, right out the door. Panic and embarrassment warring for prominence in her mind.

He stopped her with fingertips on her elbow as she brushed past.

"Can't do what?" He asked softly.

Tears threatened. Emotions she couldn't identify churned within her. Keeping her head down, murmuring the first thing popping into her mind.

"Ruin your career."

"Oh for crying out loud. Sam look at me." Jack scowled, annoyance apparent on every line in his body.

"Are you here tonight," throwing his arms wide and letting them drop, "today, because you feel guilty for not being able to fix what's going on in my head?"

"No, yes - no, that's not why I'm here. Shaking her head, she stepped back so she could look into his face, "No, guilt is not why I'm here."

He sighed, "Well that clears that up." A lopsided, sad smile moved across his face. "You don't have to do this. I know."

Watching in fascination as that smile curved his lips. She wondered, that mouth. How many times had she dreamed of kissing that mouth? Not nearly enough she decided. Seeing the yearning in his deep brown eyes, Sam found she didn't need courage after all.

Raising a trembling hand to stroke the side of his face, whispering, "Life is too short for me to pretend anymore." At her touch his eyes flared hot - she welcomed the heat.

Framing his face with her hands, feeling his beard roughened skin, she said, "I have to do this for me. If you don't want to hear this you'd better run."

His body motionless, Jack's eyes never wavered from hers.

"I'm through running."

Pulling his head down, Sam lifted her lips to his. Ever so slowly she kissed him, wanting to enjoy this first meeting of lips, to remember forever this anticipation. His lips were warm, firm. Her heart hammered, demanded, still she moved slowly, tracing the contours of his mouth. Her lips moved over his face, his closed eyes, and the scar on his eyebrow. She teased his lips apart, taking the kiss deeper, tasting his rich full flavor. 

One heartbeat she was in control and the next he was. His strong arms encircling her, lifting her almost off her feet, crushing her against his chest. Jack's mouth devouring hers, hot, hungry. 

Sam went from slow burn to flame, straining against him, her fingers in his short silver hair. Offering everything, taking all he would give.

Breaking off the kiss, Jack buried his face in the soft warm silk of her neck, breathing hard. Laying her head in the crook of his neck, Sam gloried in the feel of his arms tight around her. She could feel the thunder of his heart and knew it echoed her own. 

More, she thought, more.

When Jack raised his head, she met his gaze, amazed at her calm. She loved this warrior, with his bright fierce eyes that stared into hers. Once more she lifted a heed to stroke his cheek. "Why haven't we done this before?"

Jack shook his head slightly. "Court martial?"

Tasting his lips once more, Sam murmured, "What could they do to us that is worse than what we've done to ourselves?"

His long fingered hands gripped either side of her face, and he dropped his forehead to hers.

"Be sure, Sam." His voice raw. He lifted his head just enough to search her eyes. "We can't ever go back after this."

Pressing a kiss into his palm, she rubbed her cheek against that kiss like a cat. "I've never been so sure of anything in my entire life. I love you, Jack O'Neill."

Swooping down, Jack captured her lips again. Dizzily Sam grasped his wrists to keep herself form floating away. "Love me, Jack. Love me. I've always wanted you to."

"I do, Sam, I always have."

Jack scooped her up in his arms. Teasing her lips with his, he carried her down the hallway. 


End file.
